Hey, I’ve done it. I’ve spent lots of time hanging out with these folks. I know these are true. I offer these as a public service to anyone who gets taken in by people who make their living writing business advice columns online.
1. Don’t trust anyone who says they work for a “Media Lab.”
2. If there are more than 2 books published on the same subject that claim to offer some stunning new insight, it’s over.
3. Disregard all “Keynote Speakers.” They’re sponsoring the conference.
4. Always do the opposite of what the cover of “Wired” says you should do.
5. Disregard all advice rendered as catchphrases.
6. Don’t trust any adult who tells you what the “kids” are doing.
7. If an article touts an idea that is somehow related to a startup, the author has an interest in that startup.
8. Nobody under 30 knows how to run a company. Any success otherwise is pure luck.
9. If the VC’s start blogging about it, run.
10. Twitter is not a business model.
11. Ignore business advice from anyone who quotes business books on the NYT Best Seller list. It’s too late.
12. If you heard about it first on NPR, it’s so last year’s tech.
13. When you go to see a popular speaker if all you remember later is their hair, forget everything you heard.
14. Technology journalists have no idea what regular folks are doing.
15. Any gadget review by someone who didn’t buy the gadget is suspect.
16. If you can’t tell what someone does in the first 15 seconds of their description (or within the two sentences of their bio), they’re full of crap.
17. If anything is followed by a version number (i.e. “Web 2.0”) it’s bullshit.
18. If the person you’re reading doesn’t get paid to write then they’re doing it to sell you something. Beware.
19. Earnest, black and white headshots are the surest sign that someone’s pulling your leg.
20. Nobody gives away “secrets” because they want to help you.
Bonus Tip: 21. If they’re so smart, why are they being paid substandard wages to write a column about it?